Part 2: Build Rapport
No one is going to do business with you until they believe you care about what is important to them.

A primary key to your F&I success is your ability to make a connection with your customers. Finding this common ground is easy for some and a real challenge for others. Many industry educators rely upon scripts to teach rapport-building skills. I choose to rely upon principles. When we learn principles and take ownership of them we internalize the concepts and have the ability to apply them in most situations.
Principle #1: Project Yourself Through Your Greeting
Think about all the ways you glean information about your customers. The credit application, trade appraisal, deal worksheet and sales representative's comments all help you know how to negotiate with each of your customers. What does the customer have at their disposal to learn about you?
Building rapport begins at the sales representative's desk. Your prompt arrival, your genuine smile, your firm handshake, your eye contact and your introduction all communicate that you are someone your customer can count on to understand and meet their needs.
Principle #2: Listen to Relate
People usually like talking about themselves. When you encourage them to share information you are well on the way to gaining their trust.
If you listen well, they will tell you how to tailor your presentation so that it will be easy for them to do business with you.
Principle #3: Mirror Your Message
Most people like doing business with people like themselves. If your customer likes sports, you should like sports but a little bit less than the customer does. If they like gardening, you should do a little gardening, but not quite as well as your customer. You get the idea. Reflecting the customer's interests creates common ground and paves the way for successful negotiations.
On the other hand, I recently saw and F&I manager wearing a presidential Rolex at work. What message does this send to his customers? Could they believe he is making too much money at their expense? While there is a time and place for jewels, I am not sure the dealership is the right space to display such extravagance — especially when your customers are considering payments in the $500-%1,200 range.
Principle #4: Engage with Your Environment
Your office can also help you gain accord with your customer. While it needs to be neither large nor new, your office should be clean, neat and organized for your presentation. People do not like dealing with someone who appears unprepared and is constantly looking for something they misplaced.
Treat your customers as if they were visiting you in your home. When your office environment makes your customer feel comfortable, they will relax enough to share their wants, concerns, and fears.
Principle #5: Connect Your Customer's Choices
The F&I process is a process of choice. And all of the choices belong to the customers. Since friends like doing business with friends, the choices your customers make will correlate to your success in learning and applying the principles of building rapport.
The more connections you make with your customer, the better prepared you will be to practice your FORM — the next step in the F&I process.
Jan Kelly is president of Kelly Enterprises. She is a sales trainer and consultant, convention speaker and frequent contributor to industry publications. For information about training opportunities telephone (800) 336-4275 or contact Kelly Enterprises at www.JLKelly.com.
More F&I

Just Do It
F&I managers need training, but instead of resisting application or expecting perfection, they should improve by simply acting on what they learn.
Read More →
Dealer Lender Preferences Revealed
When lenders provide consistent, fast service, their overall satisfaction scores with dealers greatly improve, according to JD Power research.
Read More →
Leading with Purpose
In this video, Trent White explains how understanding your people’s 'why' is a key leadership responsibility of F&I professionals and how that mindset drives dealership engagement, trust and performance.
Read More →
Integrating Nontraditional F&I Products
The niche presents a strategic advantage for auto dealerships as they move to adapt to fast-changing consumer expectations in today’s market.
Read More →
Trust Is Personal
Technology, no matter how efficient, can’t replace what the human F&I manager can do, which is to bridge the divide between cyberspace and the in-store experience.
Read More →
Amplify 2026 Billed as Turning Innovation Into Results
Reynolds and Reynolds says its annual retail summit will connect dealers with practical strategies, peer insight, and technology-driven ideas.
Read More →
Own Your Outcome: F&I in the Digital Customer Journey
Finance has historically been the last step in the car-buying process, but it doesn’t have to be. The customer’s journey starts long before they arrive at the dealership, and so should F&I’s involvement.
Read More →
Tariffs Could Raise Insurance Premiums
As U.S. import tariffs affect repair costs, consumers might find it more affordable to replace a damaged vehicle, according to recent Insurify tariff analysis.
Read More →
Smaller Loans, Longer Terms
The youngest generation of car buyers is more likely to finance less expensive vehicles, more than half of generation Z consumers borrowing less than $25,000.
Read More →
New Lifetime Battery F&I Product Meant to Drive Dealer Traffic
EFG Cos. offering is intended to create lifetime auto dealer engagement with customers.
Read More →